In the consulting room: a mild case of GDPR

In which we establish an evidential link between data protection legislation, headaches and depression in general practice...

GP: What can I do for you today, Mrs Smith?

Patient: How did you get my name?

GP: The receptionist told me before she buzzed you in

Patient: I don’t remember giving her permission to share my details with a third party

GP: It’s her job to tell me who you are

Patient: She didn’t obtain my explicit consent

GP: It was probably an oversight, madam

Patient: Madam? Why is my gender relevant?

GP: It may or may not be. It depends why you’re here

Patient: Well, I’ve not been feeling myself recently

GP: I see. I understand you’ve been having a lot of headaches

Patient: And you obtained that information how, exactly?

GP: It’s all on your health record

Patient: Did I consent to this use of my data?

GP: We need the information to treat you

Patient: Where is that made clear in your privacy policy? The receptionist never mentioned it. She just sent me in

GP: She may have presumed that if you made an appointment, came to the surgery and sat in the waiting room for half an hour that you wanted to see a doctor

Patient: You can’t rely on presumption. I should have been given a clear opt-in

GP: Do you want to see me or not?

Patient: That’s my business. I’m not obliged to disclose a preference either way

GP: This is ridiculous. We’re getting nowhere here

Patient: What are you writing about me? I demand to see it

GP: I’m writing a prescription. Take it to the pharmacy and they’ll give you something that will help

Patient: That’s outrageous. The pharmacist may be able to identify me

GP: We’re going round in circles

Patient: What are you going to do about my headaches?

GP: They’re perfectly normal. You’re suffering from a mild case of GDPR. It may seem painful now but you should make a full recovery by early June

Patient: So I don’t need to do anything?

GP: No, just get plenty of rest and try to avoid processing any sensitive data

Patient: Thanks for putting my mind at rest, doctor

GP: Why are you using my professional title when it isn’t relevant to your stated use of my data?

Patient: I’m very sorry

GP: Don’t mention it – you have a right to be forgotten. Would you mind opting yourself out?

Have a good day everyone :)